The CIA Reporter
by William Burroughs

Tonight, your friendly and impartial reporter, Joe Bane,
interviews supermullah Ayatollah Khomeyinni, who styles
himself as the spiritualistic leader of Iran's 32 million
prayer-mewling Allah freaks, inspired by the invigorating
teachings of Islam: "Allah...Allah...Allah." And a more
miserable, diseased filthy breed of gooks never swarmed out
of a Beanville to spit their tuberculosis on Old Glory.

Mr. Koatimundi... doesn't your proposed cancellation of
American military contracts, termination of American bases,
invite a proportionate preponderance of Russian military
influence? Aren't you, in point of fact, crawling into bed
with the Commies, and delivering Iran to Moscow on an oil
slick? Aren't you satelliting Iran into Communistic orbit?
Aren't you in plain American English a paid hireling agent
of the unionized Soviets?

Mr. Koatimundi. In an interview with Le Monde, a newspaper
in Paris, France, you state that you have given permission
to your followers to prepare... you admit that "preparation"
entails aquiring arms. When asked where these arms are
coming from, you say: "I do not know." When asked further
if, perchance, these arms are coming from Soviet Russia via
the so-called Palestinian Liberation Organization, you say:
"I have no informations..." Well, I say you're lying in your
gums, you toothless old cocksucker-whaddya got to say about
that? - HUH?